Seriously, why do we allow politics to impact our relationships with important people in our lives, causing some of them to end? Why do we feel we are right and they are wrong? Why do we think being personally attacked if our political views or choices are challenged? You may have close friends who have different political views from yours, and you’ve been spending time and effort to convince them to see your perspective but never succeeded to this day. You may need to stop. Instead, put a strain on the relationship to prove you are right about your views and respect their beliefs like a true friend who unconditionally cares.

Here are the answers to our whys.

Our brains have the genes of our parents and ancestors through the probability of inheritance. Think of yourself as a beautifully crafted cocktail drink with a set of ingredients (or genes) carefully picked just for you. Generally, at the early stage of life (when you are still a baby), your brain will already have the information that will prompt you to cry when another baby cries, laugh, or smile, even on the most straightforward beauty you see. You also know what scares you, tastes good, or smells awful. We feel, instinctively, threatened by anything that our ancestors feared. Since politics have lived on for many years, our parents and ancestors may have developed particular fear over specific triggers- verbal (words) or non-verbal cues (gestures)- related to politics, as in choosing a leader during political elections.

We innately have prejudices over a particular political candidate who may have said or acted in a way that triggered fear and anger inside us. If your friend sometimes struggles to reason why they don’t like a political candidate, that may have come from an inherited emotion over a specific trigger. Don’t judge anyone who closes their ears to you when you share something opposite to their beliefs. They are just protecting themselves from this ‘threat.’ This is how we are all wired to think, naturally. You must understand that this political view has been developed for many years, and we should respect and honor that.

We fight for our tribe.

Humans are social beings. We survive with the help of the people around us. As they say, it takes a village to raise a child. You will have a sphere of influence as you grow up and your brain develops. This sphere of influence, or circle of trust, may consist of your close family and friends and the community or the environment that will also form part of the influence to become the person you are. Your developing prefrontal cortex picks up perspectives, views, and beliefs as you listen to the adults talking, which will form your thoughts, ideology, behaviors, or attitude toward certain things, as in politics. Since you trust them, you will trust their words, which will also help form your own political beliefs. This becomes your reality, and it would be hard to challenge that.

This sphere of influence is your experience, your reality, and YOUR TRIBE. You protect your tribe and will always be proud of its values, beliefs, and views. We fight for our tribe. This is why we see people on the streets or on social media to express their views, especially when they feel that someone they love or something they believe in is being challenged. This becomes a personal attack on them because their belief is who they are. It is personal. Imagine if someone tells you that your reality is a big fat lie, or I’m afraid you might be mistaken in choosing a presidential candidate. It is equivalent to saying that your life is a lie. This is what one feels when someone criticizes him for his views or beliefs or such that of a political choice. Politics is indeed personal. It would be nearly impossible to convince someone to change his political views.

Are you the type who likes to challenge yourself and is not afraid to be an outlier in your group?

The amygdala is that part of our brain where the seat of emotion is (where that anger and fear come from); this is the only part of our brain that has already fully developed since birth. The rational part of our brain, the prefrontal cortex, isn’t fully developed until we are about 25 years old. Hence, most teens are more emotional and may have a few more mishaps in life compared to most adults because they tie their decision-making ability to emotion (amygdala) over reason or logic (prefrontal cortex). If a child has been trained to control herself, as in disciplined, most likely the child will have the ability to suppress his emotion first and think before they act.

Politics is Personal: The Science Behind Why We Should Agree to Disagree on Political Views — Photo by Karolina Grabowska from Pexels

When we process information, we usually use that logical part of our brain, and we typically weigh by dissecting the information into as many details as possible. However, certain information can often bring us fear or threat, and we fight it off because it is convenient and requires less energy than researching to get more information. The brain shoots happy hormones as soon as we decide not to explore more. Instead, we just read or watch content that will make us happy, like those that hold our own political beliefs. If you do this on social media, you will be subjected to its algorithm, which will flood you with the same content that is of the same views as yours.

Now, if you are curious whether your view or choice is the best for the future of your children or your future, you should educate yourself. This is easy for people who are naturally curious or motivated to learn more. Their brains will fire happy neurotransmitters or hormones as soon as they start researching something they are curious about. You will also see them passionately sharing what they learned. Also, if you study somewhat, check all the presidential candidates on social media; this will improve your feed from being polarized on one end to more neutral and informative. However, if you can’t find the motivation to do your research, you may find this task daunting as this is a threat to you, and you will flee.

You can try visualizing the future and feel the excitement, benefits, and everything you desire for your country. This brain hack will make you tap into your emotion, which is typically a strong driving force. Now, you need a leader who can help you get there. Who amongst the presidential candidates, do you think, can carry out that critical mission for you? What life values and beliefs do they have? You can start researching and remember that you are doing this for your future, your kids’ future, and their children.